I wish I could say it aint so, but it’s true. I cried during ‘kalsu’
For those of you that don’t know what ‘Kalsu’ is, it’s a Painstorm workout and one that I’ve avoided for 5 years
100 Thrusters at 95lbs for women/135lbs for men
5 burpees on the minute every minute – even the first one
Tuesday we had a 25min time cap
I was actually scared the entire drive to CrossFit Legacy, and at one point thought that I was going to have to pull off the road to throw up. Why? Because this workout truly scared me for what ever reason.
I warmup, and decide that I’ll do 5 thrusters a minute and with that pace I’ll finish in the time cap. The first 5 min were fine finishing in under 35 seconds. It wasn’t until minute 10 that things started going down hill. My back was starting to get tight and tired (which Brian would later explain was because my hips were rising fast putting the pressure in my back every rep). By minute 15 I was completely exhausted. I literally had NOTHING LEFT….. I drove with everything I had and it still felt like 200lbs.
It was at minute 18 I actually started crying, yup mid workout crying. I couldn’t hold it in. I was exhausted, my back/hips were smoked and I was frustrated. I’m not proud that I cried, but it’s the reality. In those minutes 1,000 things went through my head.
“Shut up and just do it”
“You’re stronger than this, quit feeling sorry for yourself”
“why can’t I just push through this?”
Those are just a few of the things that ran through my head. Needless to say at the 25 min time cap I was only at 88 reps and NOT happy. I wasn’t happy that I didn’t finish. I wasn’t happy that I couldn’t just push through the pain. I wasn’t happy that I cried. I just wasn’t happy. Honestly I’m still not, but I’m doing my best to keep it in check and use that feeling of complete disappointment and frustration to fuel me into my next workout. Always easier said than done, but I’m not going to let one workout crush all the progress I’ve made the last 10months.
Onward and upward!